14 June 2010

turn back the clocks

One memory that always makes me reminisce and I remember so fondly was being with Bex on the strip, before it was Bobby and Bex.

Before we were officially an item, and just fooling around to see if we had chemistry, I visited Bex in Vegas during spring time. I had booked my stay at the Riviera hotel, (a little bit of a dumpy place but it was what I could afford, and I could get the room being 18.) We spent the last night I was there making out for hours on end and ordering room service at all hours of the night. In the morning we decided to forgo a taxi ride, and instead walk down Las Vegas blvd to whatever hotel/casino we wanted to go to. The walk is what I remember the most. It was hot out but it was early enough so that we weren't baking in the heat. I walked hand in hand with Bex thinking that "this was living, and this is what it felt to be alive". It was hard to walk as I often got very easily "excited" just from looking at her, and seeing her smile.

It seems like forever ago, but it was only 4 and a half years ago! I find it hard to believe that 5 years ago I graduated high school. I think that soo much life has happened in the last couple of years that it has felt like it's been much longer. Sometimes I have to remind myself, I guess... that I'm only 23 and that two years ago I was barely 21; Two years before that I was 19! Still a teenager! I'm blowing my mind right now.

I miss Bex and I only have myself to blame. I find that its easier to entertain myself by using the internet, rather than spending time with her. I have learned that I need to be mentally stimulated at all times or else I fall asleep or get restless, so I'm trying to unlearn this behavior. I miss my sweetheart. I always get caught up in this abyss of reality, fantasy, desire, opportunity and failure. I'm lucky to have a girl who will be there to smile at me, even when I'm being a drama queen.

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