27 September 2010

bex crazy

hey everyone. I bailed on the fifth day of work because I couldn't do it any more. I didn't get much sleep today but I've got some coffee in me.

So I've been really well lately. I feel like to some degree I've been level headed and in reality for the most part. Ok this reference is really bad... do you remember in the movie 'the little mermaid' when prince Eric falls out of the trance that the sea witch put on him. Well that's how I've felt lately. I feel like there has been some clarity and that the hue covering my eyes is gone.

Why do I feel this way? I dunno. I hate to feel that from night to day that this change occurred, because I would hate to feel like I just snapped into feeling normal. I'm losing that sense of hopelessness and gaining a feeling of happiness. I don't know how to describe the changes in my point of view. There seems to be some kind of switch that flipped in my head and it's allowing me to feel things I haven't for a while. I'm slowly going less boy crazy and becoming more Bex crazy.

I've been hugging, touching, holding, kissing all up on Bex and I can't get enough and it's not one of those mental 'I wanna be with you' things, it's a deep physical urge. It's weird because even in public I'm never lovey with her because it's just not what we do, but I haven't been able to help myself. The other day while having sex, I was watching her grind on top of me and it was enough to make me cum. I think about that when I'm at work and it makes me horny. Brain chemistry is weird especially when something that at once was routine and boring turns into exciting and enticing. It's taking me forever to write this post because I keep going to peek at Bex in the shower.

Ok, I'm off for the night but I will be back soon. I have off tomorrow... Oh the joys of a day off. :) I'm gonna get lucky tonight.

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