08 September 2010

men sex and hypotheticals

My admiration for men will never go away! Not that I want it to, no it will and has always been a part of me. There is nothing more enticing than seeing a man just well... being a man. I'm really horny right now, so rather than waste my time looking at porn (WhAT?) ... I figured that I'd rather blog about it. I find that some men are so irresistibly yummy. Especially ones that look like this this guy. As a matter of fact I'm obsessively in love with that picture. I showed it to Bex and she agreed that he fit into the type of guys that I find attractive.

I like guys who look young but powerful. I'd be a liar if I told you that I didn't want to conquer these young guys. I'm not sure why but I always figured that I would be into the older guys (so that I could be submissive or surrender to them.) but the thought doesn't appeal to me. Mr. V on the other hand likes older guys 25-29 (he's 19 btw) Me... my age range is somewhere from 19-28 at the oldest. I guess there really isn't much of a difference. I think I like the whole youthful look to some guys.

If I had a friend who I could sleep with, who was young, attractive and friendly... I think that I would go insane, especially when I was horny for set friend. I don't know necessarily how to distinguish what I need vs what I want sexually... but OMG to have a fuck buddy... It would be insanely awesome. In fantasy land (because thats where I retreat when I'm running hypotheticals in my head) I could have a really good friend whom I go out with and party with and get/give the occasionally blow job. Obviously in Fantasy land it always works out and there are no hurt feelings, but from what I understand people are more complex especially when it comes to relationships.

No, my admiration of the male form will never go away. It is nice to be able to share my feelings with Bex though, I couldn't have survived much longer in the closet. I think that now that I'm finally getting over obsessing about gay sex and being depressed about not being able to explore my sexuality. It's all good, for now.

Let's have a good day today, shall we :D


  1. Bobby, i always like the guys you choose to highlight, they all look yummy so we must have similar tastes. Once you have your first time, which I hope is awesome for you, you'll really be able to reconcile your fantasy with reality. But it sure is nice to dream about it, even if it drives you insane with lust.

  2. Bobby -- I just listened to this song, which is kind of the anthem for people coming out. Music has a way to hit the right emotional cord, better than words alone. Here's the lyrics, and a musical clip on YouTube: www.youtube.com/watch?v=TxUC_UcKFJk

    ARTIST: Jerry Herman
    TITLE: I Am What I Am
    [La Cage Aux Folles]

    I am what I am, I am my own special creation
    So come take a look, give me the hook or the ovation
    It's my world that I want to have a little pride in
    My world and it's not a place I have to hide in
    Life's not worth a damn 'til you can say, hey world
    I am what I am

    I am what I am, I don't want praise I don't want pity
    I bang my own drum, some think it's noise I think it's pretty
    And so what if I love each feather and each spangle
    Why not try to see things from a different angle
    Your life is a sham 'til you can shout out loud
    I am what I am

    I am what I am and what I am needs no excuses
    I deal my own deck sometimes the ace, sometimes the deuces
    There's one life and there's no return and no deposit
    One life so it's time to open up your closet
    Life's not worth a damn 'til you can say, hey world
    I am what I am

  3. thanks :) That was a pretty cool song! I wonder if that was on a broadway show? I'm glad you and I have similar tastes. Those boys are to die for ;) I don't know if I'll ever be able to merge my fantasy with reality, but I know if I ever do... that it'll be earth shattering...even if it's not all that i've built it up to be. Oh and I hope that it's with a boy that looks like that guy!!!!!

  4. Bobby -- there's gay in you since you recognized it was from a broadway show! It's from the musical La Cage Aux Folles -- which was the basis for the movie comedy "The Birdcage" starring Robin Williams and Nathan Lane.

  5. Oh Bobby I hope that one day you don't become resentful of Bex due to the fact that you did not explore your bi/gay side. I know you love her but I hurt for you and her sometimes.

    I am impressed that you didn't go to porn first but I think you may be fighting this very hard.


  6. :D Thanks PY. I believe that we'll be ok. Life has no certainties, i know i know... but I'd like to believe that all of it wont matter in the end. I resent the fact that I was in ultra denial and should have delt with it before marriage... but now I have to lie in the bed that I made for myself. (It sounds horrible when I put it that way.) Bex tells me all the time "just be my friend" as in "don't hurt me right now and just be nice". It brings me down to earth when I get high on myself ;)