10 April 2011

not hung over

The morning is beautiful. I must have slept only 4-5 hours and I'm still a little sloppy. I woke up still in my club clothes and still my hair was did ;). Having breakfast like yesterday and cleaning up my act. So I overestimated how much beer I drank. Somehow I believed that I was on my 8th or 9th but counting the bottles... I only drank 7. Whatever I still got mad buzzed, not shit faced because I've realized that I don't like being that much of a mess.

I really enjoyed last night, maybe a little too much. Reflecting upon all the debauchery and all around naughtiness of last night, I hope it happens again. It's my own little way of having fun and keeping it in my pants (atleast keeping it out of someone else's pants.) So I'm kind of glad that the gay club didn't work out because I might not have been able to do what I did last night. Actually I know that I wouldn't have allowed myself to have that kind of fun and it would have been harder to turn someone down.

Bex and I have not had sex in about 20 days or so (since that three timer). I guess I got upset with her for baring my soul and still not being understood. I know now that I really unfairly asked for too much. Unless she was on every page that I was on, she'll never understand and I'm working my way into living with this. I'll always try to explain it all away, but I'm thinking it's time to move forward. Hopefully make some progress. No more abstaining. I can't be angry at her and try to fall back into love, it'll never work. I'm planning on giving it to her real hard when she comes back on Monday. Wish me luck.

Plans for today? Well as soon my little world stops spinning... I'd much rather go sit in the sun, maybe work out a little. Those naughty pics I received were inspirational, so I need to stop dicking around and get my shape on. I've been casually working out and casually seeing results. I think I'll ask Bex for P90X on my birthday which is coming up soon, UGH 24! Do you remember that I was 22 when I started this Blog!??!?!?! Fuck.

I still haven't figured my life out or the point that I'm trying to achieve, but for this brief moment in time...

I ♥ my life 
And I'm going to savor this moment.

2 comments:

  1. Bobby: That's the spirit! Attitude plays such an important role how we view this world of ours. If you continue to stay positive and see things as half full rather than half empty all the time, you'll feel better about your situation. Now that does not mean you settle for what you have and give up on your hopes and dreams. Far from it. You use the advantages you currently have to help you get those things you want from the future. And you use what's missing as motivation to achieve those goals.

    As you mature, you realize you can't always be impulsive and chase after everything you want. You weigh the cost vs. the benefits, and you try to strike a happy balance between staying true to yourself while maintaining harmony in your surroundings. Stay strong and focused on what you want out of life.

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  2. You will love P90X! Maybe you can get Bex to do it with you?

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